Since this blog is partially dedicated to movies, and more specifically the horror genre, I had yet another new idea to embrace the holidays this year through the blog. I’ve really been feeling the season lately, as I do most every December. Christmas and Halloween are my favorite holidays and overall favorite seasons of the year, yes to me they are and always will be their own seasons. I live for the last 3 months of the year basically, so I decided to combine my love for horror and my love for Christmas and pick 2 seasonal based horror flicks to discuss and review. One of these yuletide flicks sleighs and the other is ho-ho-horrendous. Let’s get into it!
The Gingerdead Man
The Gingerdead Man is a 2005 horror comedy flick distributed by Full Moon Features, directed by Charles Band, and starring Gary Busey. Boy, this was…a movie. If you want to call it that, I prefer to call it a waste of time. The story opens with a killer named Millard Findlemeyer (Busey) holding up a diner and killing the brother and father of the main protagonist, Sarah. Findlemeyer is eventually apprehended and sentenced to death though, but his ashes are somehow mixed into gingerbread dough that is sent to the bakery that Sarah and her family own and operate. A little work accident causes blood to mix in with the dough and voila, a walking and talking gingerbread man is born. That’s basically it summed up and look, I by no means was going into this movie expecting gold. I knew it would be bad and I was totally cool with that. I can get down on some objectively bad and cheesy horror sometimes, so I was expecting a fun bad that you can shut your brain off to and enjoy. It wasn’t that either. This movie was primarily all shot in the kitchen of the diner and that grew old rather fast, the acting was worse than B level, the gingerbread man himself looked awful. Like how are you going to have a movie centered around a killer gingerbread man and have him look like a lumpy, plastic turd? Even worse, this movie had nothing to do with Christmas! I was looking through Christmas horror lists on websites and almost every one of them included this movie somewhere on them, so I figured I’d give it a go. Gary Busey is an entertaining enough character and I like the aesthetic of the gingerbread men, but boy was I disappointed. Not even 1 mention of Christmas or 1 decoration to be seen in the background, so I say again…how are you going to make a movie about a killer GINGERBREAD MAN and not have it centered around Christmas? Missed opportunity to make this a little more bearable at least. Even Gary Busey’s funny little quips and one liners as the Gingerdead Man were not near enough to save this boring, dumpster fire. Ho-Ho-Horrendous!
Christmas Evil
Christmas Evil is a 1980 Christmas horror flick, written and directed by Lewis Jackson and starring Brandon Maggart. The story follows a good intentioned toy maker named Harry, who after being traumatized by the realization that Santa doesn’t exist in the way he once thought decides to take matters into his own hands and become the big man himself. Innocent enough on the surface but Harry takes his role a bit too seriously and begins stalking and spying on the neighborhood kids throughout the year to see if they’re being naughty or nice, as well as growing more and more hatred for his bosses and coworkers at the toy factory he works at for losing the true meaning of Christmas and downing the holiday while trying to profit off the consumerism it revolves around. Things reach a climax though on Christmas Eve night when the unstable Harry dons the beard and suit and hits the streets as the big man himself. Doing good, like delivering toys and presents to all the good boys and girls and supplying the local children’s hospital with plentiful gifts, but also doing bad like murdering his enemies and non-believers in cold blood at their homes and on the streets. This movie captivated me from start to finish and really hit a fever pitch around the actual holiday, making it an even better Christmas horror film to throw on in December. It truly embraced the holiday in all facets. The vibe revolving around Harry’s Santa obsession, the setting with the toy factory and decorations in and around the homes featured, and the dialogue with everyone building up to and anticipating the big day, while also still giving you a feeling of unrest as you were strapped in for Harry’s descent into madness throughout the season. I’ve heard a review for this movie say that “It’s like Taxi Driver, but Christmas.” and that sums it up about right. The main lead, although flawed and crazy, had good intentions and deep down just wanted to be treated with respect as he tried to revive the sanctity of the season and of Santa Claus. This movie was certainly good enough to be added to my yearly rotation of horror movies featured on my Christmas watchlist, with Krampus and Black Xmas, and is one of the better Christmas horror films I have yet to find and watch myself. All in all, this movie sleighs!!
